Monday, January 24, 2011

Seriously Terrible Blog Posts

(bad, bad, bad ... maybe that's good)

As you can tell from my potentially best-selling but currently nonexistent book and the movie rights I expect to sell as soon as my life develops some kind of plot, I have the potential to be an expert blogger.

And so, tonight I am generously offering my expert opinions on how to develop seriously terrible blog posts.

Why would you want to have terrible blog posts? I'm glad you asked. So far, my 2 most popular topics of all time are:

1) Seriously Terrible Halloween Costumes


2) Seriously Terrible Holiday Gifts

For some reason, people have actually googled these exact topics. Seriously. So surely there must be people actively seeking Seriously Terrible Blog Writing Tips.

Happy to oblige.

How To Make Sure Your Blog Posts Are Seriously Terrible:

A. Ramble on and on interminably about absolutely nothing. Look back at any of my previous posts for examples.

B. Make each post one long paragraph. Walls of words are so much fun to read.

C. Jump from one topic to another. Be funny one day, morose the next, right-wing on Wednesdays and left-wing on Thursdays. When you have nothing else to write about, try poetry. Make sure it rhymes.

I hope these tips have been helpful! Forget spelling, grammar, sentence structure and cohesive thoughts. Seriously terrible is the way to go. Take it from me.

Blog away!


1 comment:

Lily Robinson said...

Hey, I've read those blogs! I cannot stand the one-long-paragraph posts. PEOPLE! Hit the enter key... it's that easy.


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