Friday, March 4, 2011

Oil Prices ... yawn ...

(do these lips make my wrinkles look smaller?)

Crude oil prices shot higher Wednesday! Violent clashes in Libya! Concerns about petroleum supplies!

Excuse me while I yawn.

Gasoline now costs $3.39 a gallon at our local 7-Eleven, compared to just $2.99 thirty seconds ago when we filled up our Toyota Camry which thank goodness we only drive 5 miles a week, so that fill-up will fortunately last us several months.

Still. That's a big increase.

Why am I still yawning? Hey, it could be worse.

I got a Macy's flier in the mail today, advertising Estee Lauder Skin Care Products. Did you know that their Advanced Night Repair products are inspired by 25 years of DNA research? I'm sure Watson and Crick are, like, totally thrilled to know that their double-helix discovery paved the way for these revolutionary products, which will make my blotchy, wrinkly face look exactly like a 25-year-old supermodel with remarkably large, puffy lips.

What does this have to do with the price of oil? I'm glad you asked.

Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair Eye Cream is available at your local Macy's store for ONLY $49.50 per half ounce.

According to my extensive research and my handy dandy calculator, my brand new face will therefore cost a whopping $12, 672.00 per gallon.

Whew. And you thought gas was expensive.

I wonder what those puffy lips will cost me. I'll keep you posted.



Bruce Coltin said...

It's a great face. I don't care how much it costs.

Fran said...

Once you have developed lips that look like that, please post another profile photo so we can all see ...


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